Being Home. Jesus is Enough.

Being home surprisingly has not been as bad as I had expected, thank you Jesus. Sure, I miss Swaziland like crazy and I miss my team(best friends) a whole lot too, but Jesus has given me such a peace. It's so weird haha, i don't know how to describe it...but He's given me such peace about being home right now and that the kids and people we ministered to throughout manzini in the carepoint and hospitals are okay. ha They're in great hands and God will never leave them or ever forget about them. I have peace.

Simply being home for 4 days God has already taught me so much. I've had so so so much time to process about Africa and I've only hit the top of the ice and boy its been so good. Daddy has been teaching me much about my time in Africa and why I was even there.
While I was there He disciplined me and grew my faith. He showed me that I am no different than the orphaned child. Just as Jesus never forgets or abandons them, so He never forgets or abandons me. That truth is for you and me too!! Jesus delights in me!
I learned that I don't let God love me. He wants to love me big, but i only let him in a little and then close him off. He wants all of me! He wants to show me new things and take me deeper in His love. He is such a loving Daddy that loves to cradle me in His arms and stare into my eyes.
I want to run to him with my arms raised high yelling "take me, Daddy, take me," just like the Swazi's did when they saw us "take me."
He's simplifying my faith....a childlike faith.
Man, God just showed me that He is enough. God didn't take me to Africa so that I could come back home with a cool story about a miracle or how people got healed and the country was revived and people believed in jesus....
Those things are great and its cool that people come back with that. However, God restrained that from me on this trip. My heart is not ready for that yet...my heart is still selfish and prideful. Jesus alone is enough! I don't need a cool story, though sometimes i still wish i had one to share with you. But Jesus is enough. I went to Africa and God showed me Jesus...and He is enough. God took me to Africa to humble me and love on me.
He showed me that it's not about me at all. It's only about Him.While i was sick and home from ministry me and God re-evaluated my passion for missions...am I in it for the glory and cool stories or am I in it solely to love on the people in front of me as a way of making jesus famous? Am I in it just to put that on my list of things i've done and mark off another country i've been to? Or am i truly passionate about this because Jesus is too and my heart breaks for what breaks His?
That was scary to re-evaluate while being in Africa. My heart had good intentions yet was in a bad place. Pride seeped in and flooded my heart...Then I allowed Jesus in and He cast it out.
It's so important to daily check your heart and ask God to renew your mind...
I learned to pray ephesians 6 every day...to put on the armor of God daily. I didn't realize how important that is until Africa where it's essential to do so daily.
Jesus is revealing so much to me right now and it's so humbling and I am beyond thankful for where He has brought me and what He has taught me while in Africa and even being home right now. His presence is so good.
Jesus is enough! Jesus is enough!! Jesus is enough!!!!!!! You don't have to have a cool story or feel anything, speak in tongues, heal people, prophecy, see visions, dream dreams...Jesus is enough!! Those things are gifts, they're not Jesus. If you have those gifts, thats super awesome, and if you don't thats just as awesome. JESUS IS ENOUGH!!!
open up your heart and let Jesus love you!! Let Him cradle you in His arms and stare into your eyes. You are His beloved in whom He is delighted in!!

Thanks for listening.
Laura Beth Harbin

“There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered.” - Mandela